Happy third birthday in heaven, my sweet Matthew. Every single day since your passing has been more brutal than I ever knew life could be. I would have given anything for you to have a chance here. I’m so sorry I couldn’t save you. I will never stop wondering who you’d be today. I miss you always, in everything that we do as a family. I love you.

10 thoughts on “Three

  1. almost cant believe its been almost 3 years that Ive been following every single post you’ve made….our boy Dawid’s 3 year in heaven is in August…thinking of you today…love from me in Cape Town.
    …so true about what you said about life being more brutal….


  2. Thinking about you today. Sending love to you, Mark, and your beautiful boys. ❤️❤️❤️Remembering Matthew, always.


  3. I’m sorry I’m late on this but I want to let you know that I’ve been holding you in my heart for the month of July. Earlier this month we were at the beach and I have a picture for you. I don’t think I can post it on your blog, what is the best way to get it to you?


  4. A belated comment but I’ve been thinking of you this entire time.

    Who they would have been, yes. The constant question. I’m now busy with a new infant, but even though I’ve spent almost every moment of these first seven weeks with her, and even though I can list some differences between her and her brother, I know I still can’t say who she will be in the future. And it makes me think how much there is we will never know about her sister, who would have also been three this coming October.

    There would be tantrums, that we know for sure. And some tension about food and picky eating. What toys would they like? Would they be running around a lot, or more the patient kind of kid that watches and takes everything in? How would they get along with their siblings? We will never know, but there is so much love nevertheless.

    Happy third in heaven, Matthew.


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