Dear iPhone autocorrect, never once have I intended to type the word, “ducking.” Okay? Thanks. Continue reading
Random thoughts; deepest happenings
So lately, as I look around at the people in the world, at times I find myself zeroing in on someone random (of any age), thinking, “I wonder why that person is alive and Matthew isn’t…” I don’t like that I always think these things, but I can’t help it. Continue reading
IBS grandma and where the hell have AB and JVB been?
“Let me tell you a story about Mark’s turtles. When your daddy was little he had two turtles, Herman and Henry. They were both boys. But then one day, Mark found Herman and Henry mating, so we realized Henry was really a girl! And Henry eventually laid eggs somewhere, but we never found the babies! So then we changed Henry’s name to Henrietta!” Continue reading
So we may have called 911 unnecessarily…
I think I’ve mentioned before that when I was just a wee one, I was the victim of an armed robbery home invasion, so ever since then, for about 20 years, every time someone knocks on the door or rings the doorbell, I tend to think the worst is about to happen. Never mind that it’s election season, and the most likely scenario is that it’s someone stopping by to try to convince us to vote for a specific candidate. Nope. I immediately think that an armed robbery home invasion is imminent, and I make all efforts to hide the kids, hide the wives, hide the kids, hide the wives. (Not really, but remember that viral video?!) But in all reality, I may jump into the nearest closet. Continue reading
My mom came to visit this weekend, and she and Mark got into a debate about who was an earlier walker, Mark or me (because we each walked around eight or nine months). And they were getting weirdly competitive about it, like so much so that they were pulling out baby books to verify dates and calculate ages… And then, because we’re focused on all things baby, Mark randomly popped some of his parents’ home videos from his first year of life into our VCR (yes, we have one of those)… Continue reading
My “journey” with breastfeeding and back into society… Sort of.
My mom thinks she was a super paranoid, protective parent, but in some ways she failed because she allowed me to ride the school bus when I was in sixth grade, and our school bus driver, Rodney, later was fired (and arrested) for drunk driving. And this was all before the orthodontist she so carefully selected for us was indicted for felony cocaine possession. (No wonder my jaw clicks to this day.) Continue reading
Within the first week of Joel coming home from the hospital Mark spent, I kid you not, 2.75 hours calling around St. Louis nurseries in search of the perfect pine tree for our front yard, because, when we constructed our house, we spent thousands trying to preserve an oak tree that is now dead, so we are being forced to plant a replacement tree in effort to recover our tree deposit from our municipality. But my point with this is that Mark needs to learn to better manage his time. Continue reading
Three alarm f#ckory
So this story is embarrassing, and I should probably be writing something more reflective/serious, but I just can’t because I feel compelled to write this instead because it seems more fun and also distracting… So last Thursday night we had what I’d consider to be a three-alarm fuckory at our house, which confirmed to us that during this time of heightened anxiety, in moments of non-stress, Mark and I can be relied upon to go ahead and manufacture some stress ourselves. Continue reading
Thinking of your blender… and you… but mostly your blender.
Recently I’ve been reminded (in the most bizarre of ways) that we have one extraordinarily special blender. It’s practically a national treasure, it seems. It’s commercial grade – the one you’d find at St. Louis Bread Company or Smoothie King – it’s a Blendtec. And Mark purchased it several years ago from Amazon for ~$7,000. Continue reading
Chickydoodles? (On naming my blog)
The other day someone asked me how I came up with my blog name. And several months ago I wrote a post to explain where I got “chickydoodles” and never posted it, but I’m posting it today, because an inquiring mind wanted to know, and it’s always smart to write for a target audience of one. And also, these past two weeks I’ve been struggling with intense feelings of exhaustion and isolation, so I tried to write about the exhaustion piece of this, but I failed (for obvious reasons). Continue reading