Cemeteries and beer

Luckily Memorial Day weekend flew by rather quickly thanks to Mark’s parents and sister and brother in law who all visited from out of town, Mark’s parents from Iowa and his sister and brother in law from Nebraska. As part of the weekend, we scheduled a couple of St. Louisy activities (you’re jealous) because we didn’t really have other plans and because some of our visitors hadn’t spent enough time in St. Louis to have experienced them, in all of their glory, before. And our weekend included other activities too – some dinners out and good conversation and a fishing trip and a quick Monday morning visit to the cemetery where Matthew’s ashes are buried… Continue reading

Prove it

I enter our kitchen after a long day’s work. It’s a cold November night, already dark outside. My phone starts ringing – I can feel it vibrating in my purse. I fumble for it, finally finding it. I glance at the screen. I’m relieved to see that it’s Mark. He’s in Minneapolis on business, doing audit work for one of his many Minnesota clients. His schedule is demanding when he’s out of town. So I’m glad for the opportunity to talk to him – the days are long, and the nights are longer sometimes in my state of intense grief, especially when Mark’s away. Continue reading

Some inconvenient truths

I’ve found that life after tragedy is, among many things, one big study in human nature which I never asked to lead. And I feel like, as the one who experienced this particular tragedy, I’m indeed leading it, or at least my own version of it, because I could compile all of my observations related to the ways in which different types of people react/don’t react to Matthew’s death (and to others’ experiences similar to mine, or dissimilar, yet also tragic) and put them into a research paper or a book, even. And I’m sure it would be so entertaining that it would drive a helluva lot of people into a comatose state. Continue reading

The 16 shittiest things people said this year

Turn on your television during the days between Christmas and New Year’s, and you’ll quickly notice all of the “best of the year” lists – 100 funniest reality TV moments, 25 most dramatic plays in sports, 10 best songs, etc., etc., etc. So, as we conclude 2015, I’m posting a similar list – the 16 shittiest things people said this year, to me or others, regarding Matthew’s death. Continue reading