Howie died. So now we have Winnie.

It was difficult to know what/how much to tell Joel about Howie. The morning after we put Howie down, I probably did everything child psychologists tell you NOT to do as it relates to explaining death to kids… I first didn’t say anything at all. Then, when Joel, with a confused look on his face, went to go feed Howie, I explained, “Howie took a vacation.” He seemed to accept this much to my relief. Continue reading

“It’s like this.” Maybe. (A book review. Sort of.)

I recently read a book for book club called Tell Me More: Stories About The 12 Hardest Things I’m Learning to Say, by Kelly Corrigan. It’s been one of the most helpful books I’ve read as it relates to grief and life, and I think it should be required reading for all of humanity. I don’t know that it’s really considered a “grief book.” But it is about how tough life can be in general and thus tackles a lot of rough stuff, so, needless to say, I could relate to it. I should also mention that Kelly Corrigan has a sense of humor, so although this is a heavy read, there are lighter parts, maybe even a few laughs, in here as well. Continue reading

Howie

I posted about this on Instagram, but I figured I’d elaborate here… We recently had to say goodbye to our sweet fur baby, Howie. We had Howie for about ten years – he was our first “child” before we had real children, and he was with us through a crap ton of both good and bad times. For some reason the bad times are sticking out in my mind more, particularly job loss and moving and home building (which wasn’t all bad but was pretty awful before I knew what truly awful felt like) and obviously Matthew’s death. Continue reading

It’d actually be perfect if…

This summer someone gifted us this blue, plastic, blow up whale that attaches to a sprinkler and shoots water out of its blow hole, because, what else, right? For most of the summer it sat unopened on our countertop, because it was hot and 160 percent humidity, and because our grass died (AGAIN) rendering our yard (mostly) muddy. So, for the life of me, I couldn’t get motivated to set this thing up. Continue reading

Runaway trailer; life just loves robbing me of my sanity

Last weekend Mark and Joel went on a father/son outing. They took the Dodge Ram 70 miles down I-44 to Cuba, MO to a place called Cowtown USA to pick up a camping trailer that I think we’ll probably never use, but Mark thinks we’ll use ten times per year, which is kind of a disparity… (Joel sat on some riding lawnmowers and boats, and then they ate some barbeque food as well.) I just can’t even with this description. I swear next thing I know it we’ll be raising goats, or hogs, in our backyard. I’ll be like my work friend who has a goat named Pinesol. Continue reading

I’m alive, and I have some (unimportant) updates.

Oh hey there. So I’m actually not dead. I feel like maybe people could be wondering. Like the other day, I was texting with some friends, and there’s this baby loss mom who hadn’t blogged or posted on Instagram in quite some time or whatever, so we were literally fearing the worst (until we found her), so I’m hoping no one has been searching for my obituary, but who the hell knows? But, on second thought, I’ve been posting on Instagram, so this isn’t an apples to apples comparison. Continue reading